8am meetings are difficult enough.
to be sent the meeting request at 3:20am (of course, the person who sent it is in IDC).

usually arriving at 9am, i came in for an 8:30am meeting today, because it was on my calendar yesterday. giving me a mere 5 hour of heads up is on the slight unrealistic side (i have many meetings and projects to get to, rather than to carve out time for the last minute invites)...
but to expect me to know to check my email before 8am and be there, or dial in...

i know i was listed as optional, but the faux pas still exist, you just shouldn't do that... it's disrespectful of people's time and not playing nicely with the 'global peers'.
argh.

Pandora played this song today... it's so cute. the Frank Sinatra version...

Would you like to swing on a star
Carry moonbeams home in a jar
And be better off than you are
Or would you rather be a mule?

A mule is an animal with long funny ears
Kicks up at anything he hears
His back is brawny and his brain is weak
He's just plain stupid with a stubborn streak
And by the way, if you hate to go to school
You may grow up to be a mule

Or would you like to swing on a star
Carry moonbeams home in a jar
And be better off than you are
Or would you rather be a pig?

A pig is an animal with dirt on his face
His shoes are a terrible disgrace
He ain't got no manners when he eats his food
He's fat and lazy and extremely rude
But if you don't care a feather or a fig
You may grow up to be a pig

Or would you like to swing on a star
Carry moonbeams home in a jar
And be better off than you are
Or would you rather be a fish?

A fish won't do anything, but swim in a brook
He can't write his name or read a book
And to fool the people is his only thought
And though he's slippery, he still gets caught
But then if that sort of life is what you wish
You may grow up to be a fish

And all the monkeys aren't in the zoo
Every day you meet quite a few
So you see it's all up to you
You can be better than you are
You could be swingin' on a star

i mentioned i wanted to do ALL THIS STUFF when my crutch days are over... i've found myself hoping that everything will heal nicely so that i'm done in a few weeks, good as new. and i am thankful even though i'm in a cast that i can at least be mobile, driving and especially with a good knee.

in the next 4 weeks i would like to

• figure out a 2 year or so plan for the future for the big milestones... like possibility of looking at buying a place, really getting finances together, bills, and looking at budgeting properly.
• figure out a follow-able routine for chores, from laundry, to dishes, to vaccum, and cleaning that works with my schedule. possibly pick up a steamer for clothes and take better care and also throw out stuff i don't need, reduce reduce reduce
• figure out my business casual clothing style. i love Maria in West Side Story's dress, love Audrey Hepburn's styles in her movies including Roman Holiday
• look at growing an herb in the aeroponics kit i bought
• figure out a daily vitamine & water drinking schedule that works with my lifestyle
• figure out a workout weekly schedule that works with my lifestyle
• walk the Nike Women's Half Marathon
• go to Colorado for the Grace Hopper 2008 conference
• figure out plans for christmas, for All Stars game in Montreal, for possible April in Europe for sabbatical
• keep in touch better with friends like Paras and Kae Chy
• try to meet more people outside of work
• keep in touch better with long distance friends like Ange, Karen, Susan, Jason, Andrew, Daichi
• keep in touch better with family, the folks, and Dan
• take more pictures, print more pictures, make scrapbook or frame them
• learn more about taking care or upkeeping a house, go to more Open houses, learn about buying a house and deals
  

i guess i was always daddy's girl...
he would always sneak me some extra pocket money for my allowance when mom wasn't looking (although i think she kind of knew that)... it's like a gulf of ocean to communicate with each other when your daughter is growing up with raging hormonal changes, and unpredictable mood swings... like every other teenager on the block.

when the teenager's angst revolve around doing well in school, choosing a career path for LIFE, leading by good example for her sibling, breaking out with acne on the face and feeling like that's the only thing anyone can see, gaining weight and trying to maintain a balance in this anorexic fashion world, crushing on some boy or other in class, end-of-the-world drama with friends... it's hard to relate to each other every day.

i remember i would worry about my parents safety when, inevitably, there would be night robberies at knife or gun-point, or break-ins after dark when drunken criminals threw rocks and bricks at the store.

Recently i was at a Baskin Robbins store on a weekend... i looked over and there at a booth sat a pair of asian father-daughter... the dad wordlessly watching in total contentment his 10 year old daughter, who was demolishing the ice cream cone with total happiness. she had a backpack on, and he held her nintendo gameboy in a plastic ziplock bag. it touched me beyond words because it was such a tender moment for the dad... he is able to provide his daughter's happiness, and he knew it, and she was totally content. as i sat there, i think, give it another year or so, and the ice cream will no longer be a sufficient solution for the girl's happiness. it won't be her fault nor his, but they were close to a turning point in life where growing up and hormones will drive them apart soon. looking at them, it made me miss my own dad.

he had told the story of when i was young (maybe 6-7 years old), the neighbour woman would pick me up from school along with her own boy, and babysit us until my parents came home from work to get me. one day, dad had the day off (he works nights as a bartender), and instead of coming to pick me up himself, he wanted to just observe my typical day.

he followed us from school, which was only a block away from home. the street hawkers selling curry fishballs and deep fry turkey legs were always outside the theatre (which we pass by every day). on that particular day, the neighbour kid wanted curry fishballs, so we stopped at the hawkers's cart. his mom bought him some, and i wanted them too, but she only bought it for her son and told me i can't have any. as we walked up the hill towards our building, my dad appeared, reprimanded the neighbour lady ("it was so cheap, and kids don't know better, she doesn't know why she couldn't get to eat the curry fishballs but that your son can, how can you do this to a kid?").
He picked me up in his arms, and we walked back to the street hawker, where he bought me 2 skewers of curry fishballs...

i had vague memories of the events, except somewhere between his storytelling and my fuzzy memories, i see the images of being in his arms, and holding the 2 skewers of curry fishballs in my little hands.

i hope my dad knows how much i love him, even through the mist of adulthood, living on the other coast in a different country, and the gulf that divided us when i was a teenager... i'll probably call him this week.

i find it's not often easy to voice what you want to voice... and then have the audience you'd like to read to pay attention.

i'm not sure why 'a thousand jagged pieces' just sounds natural to me. but it does.

hopefully this is the playground in which i can dump my sometimes random, usually mundane thoughts, especially on a self discovery journey. kind of like therapy of sorts.

so come along as i journey into the world of Product Management, and being a techy geeky sporty girlie girl, as i discover much about the world around me, and hopefully find myself amongst my own overrun jungle of words.